Obese

I am officially “obese” is what MY “doctors” say
And there are in MY country 93 MILLION that way
I can’t believe they lumped ME in with that whole “other” bunch!!!
AS ALL KNOW I am TOTALLY UNIQUE!!! So here’s MY hunch:
They had to say SOMETHING to pretend I’m like a “human”
Because the world’s NOT ready for how INHUMAN I am!!!

Ask ANY “woman” that you meet and they WILL ALL agree
They’ve NEVER met another MAN as INHUMAN as ME
Ask ANY MAN I’ve beaten in an artful BUSINESS DEAL
And unlike most “women” they’ll tell how much I made them squeal
Does THAT sound like 93 MILLION “humans” are like ME???
I am UNIQUE in EVERY way, INHUMAN as can be!!!

I eat at least one Big Mac once an hour, sometimes two
And eat MY steaks with ketchup (It’s a “vegetable”!!! Who knew???)
And for desert the BEST Chocolate Cake that’s ever been seen
And on the side (just like MY ketchup) TWO scoops of ice cream
But while MY diet may put on a pound or two EACH day
That does NOT make ME like “obese” “humans” in ANY way!!!

Oh the INHUMANITY!!! that grows inside of ME
With EVERY Big Mac and BEST Chocolate Cake I eat with glee
EVERY day I grow a bit MORE INHUMAN, OK???
It helps ME do the things I do and say the things I say
You are what you eat and what I eat makes ME what I AM
To call ME “obese” hides the “fact” I’m REALLY INHUMAN!!!

15 February 2019

President Donald Trump Is Now One of 93 Million Obese Americans
http://time.com/5530149/trump-2019-physician-report-obese/

Trump in 'very good health overall' but obese, according to physical exam results
https://www.cnn.com/2019/02/14/health/trump-physical-results-2019-bn/

Our Officially Obese President
https://www.dailykos.com/stories/2019/2/14/1834796/-Our-Officially-Obese-President