An Important Update!

Forget about your “baseball” game” Forget “Passover” too!
Tonight AN IMPORTANT UPDATE I’ll broadcast to you 
Concerning MY WAR in “Iran” that’s going SO WELL
It may be time to leave to put FORMER “allies” in HELL
Because they would not heed MY call to help ME “open up”
That STUPID “Hormuz Straight” THEIR OIL ALONE does disrupt!!!

Or maybe rather than leaving MY “Iran” WAR behind

I’ll say it’s time to “double down” on KICKING THE BEHIND

Of rag-heads still RESTING LIBERATION MY WAR brought

To their shit-hole so-called “country” where “freedoms” were NOT

Before I KILLED their “Ayatollah” who to them dictated

How they lived before MY BOMBS came to MAKE THEM ELATED!!!

Perhaps I’ll TARGET “infrastructure” of which “war crime” sings

Like “power grids” and “water works” and other “public” things

It would NOT be a “war crime” if such places I DESTROYED

The ONLY “crime” connected to MY WAR is it’s ANNOYED

ME and that’s the GREATEST CRIME EVER perpetuated

On a LIBERATOR who wants “freedoms” with equated!!!

Tune in tonight during PRIME TIME and I can guarantee

A VERY IMPORTANT UPDATE you there will hear from ME

About “Iran” for a few minutes before I then switch

The “topic of conversation” because WAR’S A BITCH

To “sell” and I’d much rather let MY PRIME TIME VIEWERS know

About NEW PLANS for making MY BALLROOM MUCH LARGER GROW!!!

1 April 2026

Trump to give “important update” on Iran tonight in prime time speech. https://flip.it/RBPsCL

Going It Alone

If you’re a FORMER “ally” who would MY Country implore

For “help” GET YOUR OWN OIL! “WE” WON’T HELP YOU ANYMORE!

And by “WE” I mean ME because the ONLY THING THAT MATTERS

In this “Iran” WAR thing YOU BASTARDS caused to shred in tatters

Is HOW STRONG I APPEAR whether or not I really am so

While MY ILL-ADVISED WAR keeps spiraling into “fiasco”!!!

“WE” DON’T NEED ANY so-called “allies” to “OUR” “burdens” share!

“WE’RE” STRONG ENOUGH to WIN WARS by “OURSELVES” so “WE” DON’T “care”

If sometimes in the distant past of so-called “history”

Some kind of “alliance” existed between you and “WE”!

Back then I was NOT COMMANDER IN CHIEF as I’m today

So with ME NOW IN CHARGE “WE” DO NOT NEED YOU! GO AWAY!!!

“OUR” WAR is GOING VERY WELL!, “WE” had ALREADY WON

Right after that “Ayatollah” “WE” BLEW TO KINGDOM COME!

But due to some DUMB “Hormuz Straight” some oil ceased to flow

Which doesn’t matter to “US”, “OUR” land has PLENTY you know

Unlike you STUPID FORMER “allies” who DEPEND ON IT

But REFUSED TO SUPPORT “US” which made things TURN TO SHIT!!!

So GO GET YOUR OWN OIL! “WE” DON’T NEED YOU ANYWAY!

“WE” have all that “WE” need so VERY SOON “WE’LL” END the fray

That has lately DEGENERATED into “endless” WAR

Because UNFAITHFUL FORMER “allies” “opted” to IGNORE

“OUR” summons to SHARE in the GLORY “OUR” WAR will SOON bring

To the ONLY NATION mired neck-deep in the thing!!!

31 March 2026

“Go get your own oil!” Trump tells UK the U.S. won’t “help you anymore” in furious rant. https://flip.it/9552pU

Obsess!

So What if the “Iran” WAR MY “advisors” PROMISED ME
Would be over in ONE DAY or at most “two” or “three”
Continues to RAGE “out of hand” throughout the “Middle East”
To thus increase the PRICE OF EVERYTHING on which you feast?
With that DUMB WAR (NOT MINE!) I’ve grown as BORED as I can be
So rather than “discussing” it here’s something DEAR TO ME!!!

MY AMAZING BALLROOM will from the hole in the ground

I dug beside MY White House soon AMAZINGLY ASTOUND

EVERYONE who sees it from the outside and those few

I invite to dine within for a MILLION or “two”

Look at MY “artist renderings” of it and you’ll agree

Once it’s constructed ONLY I MORE GLORIOUS will be!!!

STOP “thinking” about “how” and “when” that WAR (NOT MINE!) will “end”!

Instead GAZE with “wrapt” WONDER at “renditions” “artists” send

To ME of BEAUTIFUL COLUMNS that will MY BALLROOM bless

They tell ME are “Corinthian” because those MOST IMPRESS

Among all “types” of “columns” (of which there’s others I’m told)

And to make MINE MORE BEAUTIFUL I’ll have them painted GOLD!!!

LOOK AT THESE PHOTOS! LOOK AT THEM! STOP “thinking” about WAR

Which will be ENDING VERY SOON! LOOK! There is NOTHING MORE

IMPORTANT at this time in MY SECOND TERM’S “history”

Than “features” of MY  BALLROOM “designed” to GLORIFY ME!

Which will include MORE COLUMNS than ANY BALLROOM BEFORE!

OBSESS on “Corinthian” COLUMNS! DON’T OBSESS ON WAR!!!

30 March 2026

“Out Of Touch With Reality”: Trump’s Brazen New Rant Leaves Critics “Sickened”. https://flip.it/RaKvMX

Pure Undefiled State

Who better to “sign” EVERY DOLLAR BILL you’ll soon receive
Than one who KNOWS MORE ABOUT MONEY than you can believe?
Of Course that should be ME ALONE, the GREATEST BUSINESSMAN
EVER able to pull off a MULTI-DECADE SCAM
And by so doing ENRICH MYSEF through “graft” and “corruption”
To UNPRECEDENTED LEVELS thanks to “Prez” assumption!!!

MY MONEY “printing presses” I’m now running overtime
To insert MY “signature” along the bottom line
Of EVERY DOLLAR BILL ORDER next to be created

Hereafter to ensure MY EGO’s CONSTANTLY ELATED

When EVERY DOLLAR of the BILLIONS I’ll soon squirrel away

Includes “DONALD J TRUMP” on it in PERMANENT DISPLAY!!!

I’ll also ORDER the ARREST and EXECUTION of

Anyone who around MY NAME “under” or “above”

Writes on any DOLLAR BILL “FUCK” (that would be “above”)

Or “IS A PEDERAST” (under) because they want to shove

Their TRAITOROUS OPINION of their PRESIDENT when bucks

They DEFACE “circulate” to display MY “signature” SUCKS!!!

After a MILLION EXECUTIONS such DEFACEMENT should

DIE OUT along with EVERY TRAITOR who thought their “words” could

SULLY the MAGNIFICENT NAME EVERY BUCK was BLESSED

With DISPLAYING once from “printing presses” it was “pressed”

And “placed in circulation” in its PURE UNDEFACED STATE

To MONEY with “Donald J Trump” FOREVER EQUATE!!!

29 March 2026

Trump’s putting his name on everything - now it’s in your wallet. https://flip.it/7AO6rM

Who Cares?

MY Tip Top Toad Mike Toady Johnson has again come through!

The ‘deal” to fund the TSA that through the “Senate” flew

Which would have shortened “check-in lines” now growing “miles” long

Will lengthen them instead thanks to Toad Mike’s House MAGA throng

Of EXTREME RIGHT Republicans who care much more about

REPRESENTING ME than those who may soon VOTE THEM OUT!!!

I’ll have to replace EVERY RINO in MY “Senate” but

So far Toady Mike’s been able to make MY “House” Toads strut

The fine straight line that PLEASES ME and NOT do ANYTHING

That OFFENDS ME because they know if they do so I’ll fling

Them UNDER THE BUS if they EVER DARE try to DEFY

ME in ANY WAY or about things I do ask “why?”!!!

So What if “check-in lines” are “long”? I fly by PRIVATE PLANE

As do MY RICH “friends” so Who Cares if POOR PEOPLE complain

About “check-in delays” - RICH PEOPLE FLY WHENEVER WE 

WANT without standing in DUMB “lines” an ETERNITY!

If you do you’re a LOSER without the INHERITANCE 

It takes to skip “lines” and FLY FREE at “taxpayer” expense!!!

28 March 2026

There was a deal to fund the TSA! Then Mike Johnson got involved. https://flip.it/OCLwDi

Nobody Told Me!

The “price” of OIL will be WHAT I SAY IT IS, OK?,

Once I have blown the last rag-heads who closed some “straight” away!

Those BASTARDS had the “nerve” to “think” they’d keep DEFYING ME

After MY “Peace Plan”, the GREATEST PLAN in “history”

I took the time to “offer” them to OIL again score

Through that “Straight of Hormuz” so MY NEW PLAN’ to BOMB THEM MORE!!!!

What I first called a “war” which then an “excursion” became

A “military operation” they want ME to name

Because apparently I “should have got” “permission” to

DECLARE “WAR” from Toads in “Congress” I already knew

Would say it was OK to BOMB THE HELL out of “Iran”

So why DELAY when I “knew” MY Toads would APPROVE MY PLAN???

MY “WAR excursion operation” militarily

Thanks to MY NO NEED FOR “APPROVAL” PLAN went SWIMMINGLY

Ans would have been WON on DAY ONE but for some twist of fate

That placed near “Iran’s” territory some DUMB “Hormuz Straight”

Through which apparently some OIL “daily” had passed through

Which NOBODY TOLD ME ABOUT so NOT of it I “knew”!!!

Whatever they say I should call “WAR” it’s still “WAR” to ME

A WAR that should have ENDED after “Iran” I MADE FREE

But thanks to MY INCOMPETENT “Advisors” on it goes

Because that STUPID “Straight of Hormuz” those rag-heads did close

Never was a “factor” in MY TREMENDOUS WAR PLAN

Because NOBOBY TOLD ME OIL flowed ‘straight” past “Iran”!!!

27 March 2026

Trump Thinks He Can Magically Control the Price of Oil. https://flip.it/64xfP9

Trump calls the Iran conflict a military operation. https://flip.it/A5ZLa6

Necessarily

Listen to Toad Johnson! Listen as close as you can

And you will hear that we are SO NOT AT WAR with “Iran”!

MY “troop deployment” underway’s a VERY DIFFERENT thing

From putting “boots on the ground” claims MY FOES against ME fling!

“Deployment” just means I am “moving” “troops” from “A” to “B”

And where their “boots” arrive is NOT WAR necessarily!!!!

I could be “deploying” those “troops” to LOTS of places where

There has NEVER EVER been ANY kind of WARFARE!

I’ve no “idea” where that could be but FOES should NOT assume

That just because they’re heading to the “Middle East” they’ll soon

Be involved in “armed conflict” - NOT necessarily!

Maybe they’re on an OCEAN CRUISE that is FREE thanks to ME!!!

Toad Johnson NEVER LIES so you can totally believe

Him when he says WE’RE NOT AT WAR so there’s no need to grieve

For MY Marines I have “deployed” to wherever the ship

They “deploy” on ends up so MY FOES should GET A GRIP

On their “concerns” about “boots on the ground” because you see

“Boots” on ships AREN’T on “ground”, they’re on “sea” necessarily!!!

26 March 2026

House Speaker Mike Johnson still says the U.S. isn’t at war with Iran - Troop deployments be damned. https://flip.it/L9N_LB

The Point Of War

The “point” of WAR FOOLS “think” for sure is to INTIMIDATE

In ways that take the THREATS you throw at FOES from “good” to GREAT

At least that’s what I of MY “Iran” WAR want them to “think”

Is why I’m willing to take MY Country close to the brink

Of what could become WORLD WAR III if things don’t soon “cool down”

But the REAL “point” of WAR is ALL THE MONEY in it found.

Even if the “market” goes “down” LOYAL RICH “friends” know

GREAT GOBS OF MONEY they can make if I first let them know

What I intend to do before MY next “post” I send out

Once I’ve “positioned” MYSELF to make MILLIONS without doubt

Because the FIRST I tell is “Eric” to whom I make plain

How to “position” TRUMP “investment bets” for MARKET GAIN!!!

I next inform a few OLIGARCH “friends” how I’ll opine

Through MY “Truth Social” posts to make WAR FEAR briefly decline

Enough to make ME MILLIONS and some of them MILLIONS too

If like “Eric” they get “positioned” like I told him to

Be to see HUNDREDS OF MILLIONS flowing straight MY way

Through “informed stock manipulation” in LESS THAN ONE DAY!!!

If you have TONS OF CASH to start with and you want TONS MORE

MY “fees” for “inside information” that ensures you’ll score

Will be ONE MILLION up front plus your PROVEN LOYALTY

And paying 1/3 of the PROFIT I’ll make you to ME

“WAR - WHAT’S IT GOOD FOR?” is a STUPID “question” once you know

How to “position” yourself “minutes” before MY “posts” go!!!

25 March 2026

“Mind-Blowing Corruption”: Traders Placed Massive Bets Minutes Before Trump Post On Iran. https://flip.it/JNNhu9

Glut

I am NOT “folding” on “Iran”! It’s NOT a “TACO” move
To DECLARE VICTORY and leave them to find their own groove!
I offered the the chance to CHANGE their “leadership” which they
Have done and so it’s a good time for ME to slip away
Because there’s lots of other things I’d rather do instead
Of BOMBING THEM until EVERY “Iranian” is DEAD!!!

I gave their so-called “country” opportunity to CHANGE

By showing them how to their “infrastructure” rearrange

Because I am a BUILDER and to BUILD things you first must

Reduce places you want to BUILD on to RUBBLE and DUST

So now that EVERY “major city” MY BOMBS have torn down

To make way for CONSTRUCTION it’s time for ME to leave town!!!

As for that “Strait of Hormuz” thing Who Cares if it stays shut?

AMERIKA has SO MUCH OIL it’s an ENDLESS GLUT

And “countries” that “depend” on OIL from the “Middle East”

Will soon if that dumb “Strait” stays closed PAY ME DOUBLE AT LEAST

If not MORE for OIL ONLY I can ship their way

Thus demonstrating how a GENIUS can MAKE WAR PAY!!!

And so you see I’m NOT “TACOing” by taking MY leave

From “involvement” in “Iran”, instead I’ve from MY sleeve

Pulled out a GENIUS approach to GETTING RICHER by

SELLING OIL to “countries” MY WAR’s set up to DIE

By offering a way to SURVIVE if that “Strait” stays shut

Because ONLY I ALONE control an OIL GLUT!!!

24 March 2026

Trump is folding on Iran as goals still unmet and regieme remains intact. https://flip.it/gEx6Wi

So Far Away

The bottom line for ME is OIL WARS all represent
VAST POOLS OF MONEY I into MY COFFERS can get sent
By ATTACKING WEAK “countries” within which OIL’s found
Waiting for “extraction” from “locations” underground
And pumped inside big “boats” for “shipment” to places that will
PAY ME TONS OF CASH MONEY when their “storage tanks” I fill!!!

MY toady troops in “Congress” are all VERY WORRIED that

“Gas prices” have increased since I began MY “Iran” spat

Because they’re “reading” “writing on the wall” that “voters” will

Come “midterms” VOTE THEM OUT if car gas tanks they cannot fill

With CHEAP GAS I had “promised” them were coming VERY SOON

Before MY WAR sent OIL PRICES heading for the MOON!!!

Everybody “thinks” I’m “worried” I will be “IMPEACHED”

Once the “majority” MY toads now occupy is breached

By DEMONCRATS “blue-waving” in if “elections” remain

Happening which they WON’T since I’ll TOTALLY RESTRAIN

Them long enough to pocket BILLIONS from MY OIL WARS

Before I “extradite” MYSELF to “friendly” foreign shores!!!

A “private” island near St. Thomas where I’ve had a blast

Might be an OK starting point for VAST CASH I’ve amassed

From WARS I’ve started everywhere OIL WEALTH can be found

Until MUCH FARTHER AWAY with MY OIL WEALTH I’m bound

To “Hungary” maybe at first but then ultimately

To MOTHER RUSSIA where PUTIN leaves porch lights on for ME!!!

MY “get RICH being President” end game is drawing nigh

I’ve had TWO GREAT RUNS but it’s time to bid MY toads bye-bye

And let them fight it out with DEMONCRATS “blue-waving” in

While I “get out of Dodge” before the those DEMS again begin

To start “impeachment hearings” for the FOURTH attempt that they

May gain “conviction” for I LAUGH AT from SO FAR AWAY!!!

23 March 2026

The Real Reason Trump Isn’t as Perturbed By High Oil Prices as You Are. https://flip.it/.7Lydn