Blame Bobby!

Just like when “Covid” came to town and I into the breach
Threw MY GENIUS “advice” about ingesting bleach
And shoving lightbulbs up where the sun’s never seen to shine
My Brane since “Lettucegate” came has been working overtime
To come up with “solutions” to “explosive diarrhea”
Which if you’ve got I do NOT want in any way to see ya!!!

Of Course you can’t blame me for what’s “exploding” inside you!

With anything related to “health” I’ve nothing to do!

If you need to blame somebody for your bowel’s booming play
Blame Bobby Kennedy Jr. for bringing shit your way!

I really didn’t want him to be “health secretary”

But he brought VOTES MY WAY and that “position” was his fee!!!

So the next time you find your guts “exploding” in the “john”

BLAME RFK Jr. for bringing your “discomfort” on!

The “fact” I cut “inspections” back on “Taylor Farms” because

They were MAJOR DONERS TO ME was NO WAY the “cause”

Of your need to “evacuate” QUICKLY REPEATEDLY

BLAME BOBBY for HIS “Lettucegate” shit spreading sea to sea!!!

26 July 2026

Cyclospora outbreak dubbed "lettuce-gate" as concerns over parasitic illness spread across U.S. https://flip.it/x6KpBP

Unwithered

I have NO NEED “work” too hard at being PRESIDENT

Because MY STABLE GENIUS is SO INTELLIGENT!!!

IGNORE FAKE “reports” “withering” has turned MY Brane to “mush”!

MY GENIUS has never been so STABLE! I could CRUSH
Lesser so-called “geniuses” like that “Einstein” guy
Without needing to half of MY VAST Brane POWER apply!

MY “mind” has NOT “withered away”, it remains just as SHARP

As it’s been MY ENTIRE LIFE right from the VERY START

Since the day I was “born” it has steered MY DESTINY

To LOFTY HIGHTS OF POWER ONLY GENIUSES see!

As MY new TARIFFS on “lettuce” and “wildfire smoke”

Prove NO “witherings” come to MY GENIUS revoke!!!

MY “unwithered” GENIUS doesn’t “think” about masses

Of “people” I’m supposed to “lead” if they’re IMPOVERISHED ASSES!

ONLY a VERY FEW among the 1% I “like”

Enough to be “concerned” about, the rest can TAKE A HIKE

If they can’t “understand” MY GOLDEN AGE I’ve brought about

Is for RICH “friends” ALONE, not for the common MAGA lout!!!

As for MY “advisors” FAKE “reports” say “have no clue”

About GENIUS Branes and so “do not know what to do”

SCREW THEM just like the MASSES of MAGAS I’ve been ignoring

Because they too AREN’T SMART ENOUGH to get their NET WORTH SOARING

Thanks to MY GOLDEN AGE which ONLY “works” for those who need

NO “training” to take advantage of UNWITHERED GREED!!!

25 June 2026

Sources warn they 'don’t know what to do' as Trump's mind withers. https://flip.it/gtiB7D

STABLE GENIUS Trump Threatens to Tariff Mexico for its Lettuce and Canada for its Smoke. https://flip.it/2XelSQ

Clout Concern

There’s a report going around that I DON’T GIVE A DAMN

About ANYBODY BUT ME - NO woman, kid, or man

Is worth MY time to be “concerned with” so the report goes

Which is “true” but something I did NOT want to expose

Before upcoming ELECTIONS the “Midterms” hold in store

Because apparently I need to make “voters” LESS “sore”!!!

Well…I don’t “care” about VOTES so much by “themselves”, OK?,

What I “care about” is WITHOUT THEM THERE’S HELL TO PAY

For ME because if DEMONCRATS take back the “Congress” I

Managed to pack with MY TOADS because I’M A SMART GUY

I’ll be “impeached” AGAIN and with NO TOAD “majority”

This time around a JAIL CELL is the place I “fear” I’ll see!!!

But even if DEMS don’t SEND ME TO JAIL they’ll REMOVE ME

From MY “perks of office” guaranteed by TYRANNY!

BILLIONS OF DOLLARS MY “cons” and “grifting” could still obtain

Will DRY UP if I from PRESIDENCY they restrain

And “conviction” after MY “third” “impeachment” no doubt

By REMOVING ME from “office” will CURB MY CON’S CLOUT!!!

And so although it’s “true” I DO NOT GIVE A DAMN AT ALL

ABOUT ANYBODY BUT ME before “Midterms” this “fall”

They’re telling ME I’d better try to “change current perception”

That all I “care about” besides ME is BALLROOM ERECTION

But HEY!…Who Cares what “voters” say they are “concerned” about?

If I can’t RIG the “Midterms” I’ll just throw their “vote counts” out!!!

24 July 2026

Donald Trump Remains In Deep, Deep Trouble. https://flip.it/wKkhmJ

Voters Are Realizing that Trump Doesn’t Care About Them. https://flip.it/hYi8yB

Angry Trump Openly Urges GOP to Rig Midterms as Brutal Fox Poll Hits. https://flip.it/YWS3P8

Enough Wars?

The “seven” countries I’ve already used to shove aside

That “Epstein Files” thing about which I MUST stem the tide

Have not proven to be enough to make MY FOES forget

As PRESIDENTS go I am the most “pedophilic” yet

And so ANOTHER so-called “country” I’ll add to the mix

Of places I WAGE WAR AGAINST to thoughts of “Epstein” nix!!!

You’d think “seven countries” would be ENOUGH in which WAR

Would MY NOBEL PEACE PRIZE once I’d stopped them all ensure

And would make “memories” of “Epstein Files” disappear

But apparently “seven” is NOT a “number” near

ENOUGH to make THE GREATEST PRESIDENT the world has seen

By ending WARS he started achieve his NOBEL PRIZE dream!!!

MY “strikes” in Yemen Somalia Syria and Iran

Iraq Nigeria and Venezuela met MY plan

For ending ENOUGH WARS to MY NOBEL PEACE PRIZE obtain

While flushing memories of “Epstein Files” down the drain

But so far “seven’s” not been ENOUGH WARS ENDED by ME

To gain MY PRIZE and FLUSH “Epstein” so “eight” I’ll make “MALI”!!!

23 July 2026

Trump Prepares to Attack Eighth Country of His Second Term. https://flip.it/1V4o.b

Permission Denied

For 25 days from McConnell no one’s heard a sound
Nor seen him like a turtle crawling on the ground around
But I assure you HE’S NOT DEAD like rumor-mongers say
Because from two forty to three o’clock the other day
He and I had a detailed discussion about WAR
To which he’s COMMITTED and 100% FOR!!!

Mitch will go down in history as he who guaranteed

I would NOT be “convicted” despite what had been agreed

Was “treasonous behavior” for which “impeachment” V.2

Could have KICKED ME OUT if Turtleman had not come through

With the greatest gaslit “defense” likely to be seen

In Congress where gaslit “lying” has now become the “mean”!!!

So here’s to toady Mitch McConnell who’s stayed “staunch” and “true”

Through EVERY move I’ve made to DESTROY the red white and blue

Version of “democracy” MY “goal” has been to KILL

To ensure MY QUEST FOR TOTAL POWER it won’t chill

And on the way to TOTAL CHAOS on which TYRANTS FEED

Our TOADS we don’t permit to DIE while their VOTES we still need!!!

22 July 2026

Why Mitch McConnell's health has the internet so confused. https://flip.it/iK9K-q

Kentucky Gov. Andy Beshear Says He Heard From 2 Sources That Sen. Mitch McConnell Has ‘Passed’

https://flip.it/XFDimL

EVERYONE LOVES ME!

IGNORE “horrible” reports that say MY “lows” are EXTREME!
EVERYONE LOVES ME! ALL MY “poll numbers” are SUPREME!
All “pollsters” who say they’re not are “delusional” at best
And at worst are OUT TO GET ME just like all of the rest
Of DUM DEMONCRAT ENEMIES of which there’s VERY FEW
Remaining because EVERYONE LOVES ME I’m telling you!!!

IGNORE “news” about “record-breaking lows in polls”, OK?

EVERYONE LOVES ME despite what FAKE FRAUD “pollsters” say!

Only just a FEW of those FOE ENEMIES remain

To try to deny what to EVERYBODY ELSE is plain:

I’m the MOST POPULAR PRESIDENT AMERIKA’S known

And will remain FOREVER because to GREAT LOVE I’m prone!!!

IGNORE “analysts” who say they are “shocked” “new lows” are due

For ME who EVERYONE LOVES except FOES of which SO FEW

Remain there’s hardly any left to spread LIES about ME

Which are SHOCKING to EVERYBODY ELSE who ALL AGREE

NO HIGHER “popularity” will evermore be known

Than that which ALL WHO LOVE ME shower on MY GOLDEN THRONE!!!

21 July 2026

Trump Hits Record-Breaking Low in Polls, Shocking Analyst: “Horrible!” https://flip.it/mHIuou

The Fittest Ever

I’m NOT a “sack of shit”, OK?, I’m SLIM as SLIM can be!
It’s DAMNED DEM COMMIE CAMERAS putting FAKE FRAUD “weight” on ME
That makes each “photo” of ME appear to both FOES and FANS

To make MY “waistline” look like it CONSISTANTLY EXPANDS

Which obviously ISN’T “true” nor “representative”
Of the HEALTHY LIFESTYLE all know I ALWAYS live!!!

I’m NOT an “Anti-Christ Shit Sack”, OK? “Christians” agree

GOD would NOT “choose” someone FAT which is why HE CHOSE ME 

To lead his FAITHFUL MAGA MOB into the GOLDEN LAND

I “promised” them they’d see if they’d lend ME a constant hand

By sending small “donations” in to help ME dodge each trap

DEMONCRATS set for ME and by buying TRUMP-BRAND CRAP!!!

I’m NOT “obese”! MY latest “weight” is ONLY “borderline”

Towards “obese” which MY “doctors” agree for ME is FINE

So DO NOT be “concerned” about “big” helicopter chairs

I “overflow” nor about “stomach” size drawing your stares!

I have NEVER BEEN HEALTHIER - MY “body” like MY “mind”

Is the FITTEST EVER on a PRESIDENT you’ll find!!!

20 July 2026

‘He is Seething with Rage Over This Photo’: Trump’s New Pic Goes Viral for All the Wrong Reasons as Viewers Zoom In on His Presidential Seat. https://flip.it/Ben-B-

Who Cares?

Of Course it’s “very sad” when US “service members” die
In MY “Iran” WAR” but NO BLAME TO ME for it apply
WICKED DUM “Iranians” are TOTALLY TO BLAME
For having refused to take full advantage when I came
To LIBERATE THEM from DICTATORSHIP under which they
Had SUFFERED before MY MISSILES and BOMBS blew them away!!!

The “sane and decent” thing to do they tell ME is to “grieve”

When “soldiers” die but why should I? It’s not like I believe

In anyone except MYSELF and partially also 

“Members” of MY “family” who MAKE MY FORTUNE GROW!

“Service members” aren’t related to ME and so they

Contribute NOTHING to MY WEALTH “dead or alive”, OK???

If MY WAR lasts “forever” (which is the current “best guess”)

As long as it keeps MAKING MONEY FOR ME let the mess

CONTINUE because that will allow MY “stock manipulations”

To add BILLIONS MORE than I’d gain through MY “grifting” equations!

If one “outcome” of MY WAR is INCREASED NET WORTH FOR ME

And one’s DEAD “service members” Who Cares - THEY’RE NOT “family”!!!

19 July 2026

Trump on US service members killed in Jordan: ‘It’s a very sad thing’. https://flip.it/V_2GSe

‘If only Trump were sane and decent': President outrages with response to soldiers' deaths. https://flip.it/RuxThw

The Greatest Enemy

For MUCH TOO LONG “Canadians” have sent their “air” MY way!

“Air” that’s filled with SMOKE from FIRES burning there all day

And night EVERY SUMMER which fill ME with ANGRY GRIEVANCE 

Because I CAN’T PLAY GOLF when SMOKE causes “lungs” INCONVENIENCE

And apparently “breathing” is IMPORTANT , OK?,

So I DEMAND “Canadian Air” from ME kept AWAY!!!

To make “air” at MY GOLF COURSES again smoke-free “pristine”

I’ll TARIFF “Canada” for EVERY “air molecule” seen

Blowing into MY Country from their “northern” DUMP where

They’re burning WILD FIRES without one concern or care

For ME not clearly seeing on MY “fairways” and “greens” where

MY “caddies” drop MY BALLS because SMOKE HAZE obscures MY stare!!!

I’ll start with TARIFFS! but you can bet I’ll VASTLY EXPAND

MY WAR with “Canada” if their “air” continues to land

Anywhere south of their “border” where I’ll MAKE THEM PAY

To construct a “vapor” WALL that makes their SMOKE “air” stay

On their side so on mine I can see MY BALLS again

But if that WALL also won’t “work” I’ll use MY SHARPIE PEN!!!

By the time MY PEN’s added to MY WAR with “kanucks”

Their END WILL BE UPON THEM because they’ll be in MY “books”

THE GREATEST ENEMY AMERIKA HAS EVER KNOWN

Because their ‘air” refuses to leave MY GOLF GAMES alone!

I don’t care about MILLIONS being told to STAY INSIDE

But STOPPING ME from PLAYING GOLF means WAR WILL BE applied!!!

18 July 2026

Trump fumes over Canadian wildfire smoke and issues tariff threat. https://flip.it/Op3Su

Military Machoization

There is no point in challenging the “speech” I made last night
Because it was TOTALLY CORRECT and ABSOLUTELY RIGHT!
EVERY “fact” included about being ROBBED of MY
“Second” LANDSLIDE VICTORY will be the reason why
I’ll NEVER let AMERIKA hold “elections” again
Because as shown last night on “free and fair” I CAN’T DEPEND!!!

With ALL “future elections” thus completely done away

With let’s “focus” instead on MY WAR DEPARTMENT’s play

To “measure” the MIGHTY MANHOOD of all MACHO MEN

Who hope to keep their “jobs” because SIZE MATTERS in the end

Except instead of using “size” as his MEASURING STICK

Hesgeth will identify whose “T-Levels” aren’t thick!!!

To prove “testosterone” in WARRIORS is high enough

For EVERYONE in MY ARMED FORCES to have the RIGHT STUFF

Henceforth ONLY MEN with proven “X-Y chromosomes”

Will be allowed to remain in the WAR JOB each one owns

Provided they’ve got enough “T” to PROOVE THEIR MANHOOD’S SIZE

Is BIG ENOUGH to NOTHING of their MACHO compromise!!!

Of course if you’re a WOMAN in MY MILITARY you

Will have to find another “job” appropriate to do

In the “kitchen” or if like MY “wife” you cannot “cook”

The “bedroom” may be the place to “paid jobs” for you to look!

To MACHOIZE MY MILITARY your “job sacrifice”

May like MELANIA help you to WEALTHY MEN entice!!!

Well, I guess that’s it for what Today’s Poem wants to say

About ROBBED ELECTIONS that VICTORY steals away

And “measuring” MALE “T-levels” to verify ALL “TRANS”

In MY MILITARY have LOW-T NON-MACHO GLANDS

So just like EVERY “real woman” who’s WAR “career” is through

They too will have to find new “jobs” that turn a trick or two!!

17 July 2026

Trump’s Election Integrity Dud. https://flip.it/-_rpY0

Pete Hegseth wants to measure your manhood.  https://flip.it/0cQRha