Ass-Kissers Assembled

I thank MY toads assembled here today to kiss MY ass
At this year’s first assembly of ass-kissers en masse
I know each of you toady ass-kissers can hardly wait
To go around the table so each can tell ME I’m Great
But first I’ll talk about MYSELF for an hour or two
So pucker up and wait your turn, MY ass WILL get to you.

The brown noses I see around ME today give ME cheer
As I kick-off another Tremendous ass-kissing year
Where toadies like VP Mike Pence, who used to be a man,
Degrade themselves in public to proclaim how Great I AM
So after law toad Whitaker’s praise drips ecstatically
I’ll praise MYSELF because NO ONE does it better than ME.

The markets may be tanking and the world going to Hell
But ALL assembled here today tell ME I’m doing swell
Because I am their “President” beyond reason or rhyme
And WILL remain Commander In Chief until Mueller Time
To kiss MY ass they’ll twist their lips into bizarre contusions
During the time I still have left to defend NO COLLUSIONS!!!

Because I know more than MY “Generals” about drones and stuff
You ass-kissing brown-nosed toadies KNOW I AM VERY TOUGH
And although now with Mattis FIRED MY last “General’s” gone
You KNOW you can depend on ME to armed forces lead on
For ONLY I ALONE stand firm when IMMIGRANTS INVADE!!!
And now that I’ve FIRED MY “Generals” I’ll get MY PARADE.

Speaking of WAR let’s hear it for MY pal Vlad’s home country!
Afghanistan deserved invading, it’s their destiny
First “Britain”, then Russia, now us, there is NO end in sight
But just like ME I RESPECT Russia for fighting on sight
Unlike those former so-called “allies” who I’ve thrown away
Russia’s Afghan Invasion DESERVES the WORLD’S praise, OK?

I have LOTS MORE to say about ME but it’s time for you
MY brown-nosed assembled ass-kissing toadies to come through
Law toady Whitaker began by setting the bar high
It’s time for you to exceeded it and praise ME to the sky
But don’t stop there, continue ass-kissing worship ALL YEAR
As Mueller Time approaches your brown noses calm MY FEAR.

3 December 2018

A defensive Trump calls a Cabinet meeting and uses it to boast, deflect and distract
https://www.washingtonpost.com/politics/a-defensive-trump-calls-a-cabinet-meeting-and-uses-it-to-boast-deflect-and-distract/2019/01/02/21600a3a-0ec3-11e9-8938-5898adc28fa2_story.html?utm_term=.b425a75d0b86

Draft-dodger Trump says he 'would have been a good general' while trashing James Mattis in Cabinet meeting rant
https://www.rawstory.com/2019/01/draft-dodger-trump-says-good-general-trashing-james-mattis-cabinet-meeting-rant/

Trump endorses the 1979 Soviet invasion of Afghanistan in freewheeling Cabinet meeting
https://www.businessinsider.com/trump-endorses-1979-soviet-invasion-of-afghanistan-in-cabinet-meeting-2019-1